“Kindness is a virtue” is a lesson we all learn in childhood. However, in recent years, many Americans have expressed the sentiment that people are getting ruder. A 2024 Pew Research study reports that 34% of U.S. adults regularly witness rude behavior in their daily lives. Rude behavior includes filming someone without permission, bringing pets into indoor spaces, wearing headphones while speaking to someone and more.
There are various factors contributing to this perceived increase in rudeness, one being the COVID-19 pandemic. The study previously mentioned states 47% of U.S. adults believe people behave ruder in public today than before the COVID-19 pandemic. The social isolation everyone faced possibly reduced understandings of social norms and consciousness for others.
Escalating political polarization also plays a role. People are very quick to judge someone’s appearance and treat that person according to their perceived political leanings. A study done by researchers Peter Törnberg and Juliana Chueri states toxicity and incivility are more prevalent in politics, increasing party divide. Political division breeds hostility and mistrust towards strangers. More relevantly to teenagers, social media allows people to act rudely without facing tangible consequences. You can comment or post horrible things without a second thought. The belief that people are getting meaner can also come with aging. As life goes on, you might look back on your younger days with rose-colored glasses.
Psychologist Adam Mastroianni has studied this phenomenon in which people believe everyone is getting ruder, publishing a paper titled “The illusion of moral decline” in the journal Nature. In an interview with UChicago sponsored podcast “Big Brain,” Mastroianni goes on to explain that globally, people have felt that others are losing their morals for several decades. This suggests that it is a psychological trend rather than an actual concern.
It is not fair to say this is all in our heads. People are more comfortable being rude, whether that be behind a screen or face to face. Sometimes it’s even encouraged — standoffishness is seen as a sign of coolness in attractive women. It’s impressive to say something mean and not back down from it. There’s an overemphasis on self-preservation in America that teens probably take advantage of. They think it’s okay to be rude because they are supposed to care about their well-being first and foremost. Empathy is no longer important. The idea that others have to earn your respect is damaging and encourages unnecessary rudeness.
Obviously, there are instances in which rude behavior is needed for protection, but I think we all need to revisit the value of kindness and community. People should be able to ask their neighbors for favors and not worry about owing them. They should be able to live with the knowledge that someone has their back. Although the word kindness feels elementary, I think that’s part of the problem. You don’t outgrow the lessons you learned in your childhood about treating others the way you want to be treated when you turn 15. In a world where division and hatred are exploited for power, it’s important that we all recognize the strength that comes from relying on one another. Doing good deeds will encourage others to follow suit, making the world a better, more reliable place. Take the first step and be kind today.
Saktisri Gowrishankar can be reached at [email protected].
